hey girl, you’ve got a problem

I have a full-time job – Monday through Friday, 8:30 am to 5:00 pm. I have a part-time non-paying job editing books when I get home. Right now I have a 60,000 word historical romance novel I need to line edit by Thursday. THIS Thursday. I also have submissions from members of my writer’s group that I have to read and critique. Then there is the book for my book club that I have to finish reading. Not to mention the book that I am supposed to be writing.  And I also try to carve out a few moments to write on this here blog for fun. But I need to read and comment on blogs that I follow as well because they are all so awesome.

Busy, right?
So, what do I do?
I start a new tumblr blog.
Because I am a lunatic.

See, last Friday, for some reason, I  was thinking about that “Hey girl, Ryan Gosling” meme that’s going around. If you aren’t familiar, it’s superimposed text over a photo of hot young actor Ryan Gosling that says ridiculously romantic things like, “Hey girl, I love how you look in sweatpants.” Or, “Hey girl, I can record the game, let’s go to the farmer’s market instead.” Sappy stuff like that.

Then my brain led me down a twisted thought path and I started musing about everyone’s favorite crossbow wielding redneck, Daryl Dixon from The Walking Dead, and what a very un-romantic character he is. He doesn’t have time for niceties or making a girl feel good about herself. He’s got squirrels to kill and zombie ears to collect and crossbow bolts to carve from tree branches, dammit!

And then I started cracking myself up (as I am wont to do) by the images I created in my head. But not satisfied with just my thoughts, I decided to bring them to life.

I understand that if you aren’t a fan of the show, all this will make little to no sense to you and for that, I apologize.

And then, because I am an attention whore, I created a tumblr blog where I can post this insanity for the whole internet to see.  What’s even worse? It’s actually kinda popular. I started this on Friday night and as of Monday afternoon the blog already has 53 followers. For some perspective, I started my Retro Fun tumblr over seven months ago and it only has 22 followers. The last thing I need is for other people to think this stuff is entertaining! Now I’ll want to keep doing it! When I should be doing something else!

I think I have raised procrastination to an art-form.
I have a problem.

And now I gotta go Google some more pictures of Daryl to caption.
Excuse me . . .

35 thoughts on “hey girl, you’ve got a problem

  1. I get it, believe me. I am up against the most daunting deadline ever and I find myself writing a post called “The 10 characters on Twin Peaks you wish Bob had killed.” And I don’t even have any place to post it!
    I have to go now. Meals on Wheels is at the door…

  2. This is possibly the most important thing you do.

    Also, I do believe Norman would get a kick out of it. If, by any chance, he sees them, falls in love with you and has to meet you immediately, I expect a phone call. And an invite to tag along as your body guard.

    • “This is possibly the most important thing you do.” Ha! Yes. I think so, too!
      If Norman so much as tweets me, I think I will have a heart attack. If I survive, you are so getting a phone call!

  3. Hey, I watch the show, I get it. Of course I also lived North Georgia, home of Deliverance, so naturally I get it. “Squirrels aint gonna cook themeselves” Love it!

  4. I have never watched the show and I still get a kick out of your Daryl posts!

    As a fellow procrastinator, I bow to your procrastinatorial prowess. I see I have much to learn from you. [grovels obsequiously]

    Oh, and bonus points for using ‘wont’ in this post.

    • Hey, I’m not teaching anybody anything about procrastination. I don’t want people blaming me because they can’t get anything done.
      I was an English major. I feel compelled to use words like “wont” every once in a while.
      Thanks!

  5. I “liked” this one even though I don’t watch The Walking Dead. Anything you do I “like.” I even went and followed your tumblr even though I’m finding it hard these days to tweet and blog. However, what I really want to follow is your Retro tumblr and the link in this post took me to Daryl tumblr. Can you go back in time and send me the link to Retro tumblr. Pretty please? :-)

  6. Sister, remember me when you need a personal assistant. It’s bound to happen as fame is inevitable. I know this because I found these pictures/captions combo a hoot and I don’t even like zombies. I know, I’m sorry. Anyways, I’d require a company car of course and you’d have to pay my cell phone bill but otherwise I’m super self sufficient. Give it some thought. I’m going to go fluff my resume.

  7. I am so old and clueless I have no idea what any of this is. But I am still “with-it” enough to tell that you funny, girl.

    Your new posts are not showing up in my “blogs I follow” inbox. ARrrgggh! WordPRess, what are you doing to me???

    • Thank you, Peg!
      I’ve had to switch to email notifications for the blogs that have it because I found a lot of them weren’t showing up in my WP feed, either. However, I have been a very bag blog friend lately and am way behind on reading posts from all you wonderful people.

  8. I think that’s one of the reasons I am so hopelessly smitten with that man. (sigh) I do love these! They crack me up and give me an excuse to show them around while I take a look myself. Such a cutie pie he is!!! :)

    Thanks for starting this.

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