mauled by puppies

Puppies maul abandoned cancer patient (click on link to read the full article)

Am I just sick, or did anyone else kind of giggle while reading this?  Yes, it’s horrible that this poor, sick man was abandoned by his own daughter and left to die.  She should rot in hell.  But, holy crap, people!  Mauled by puppies!? 

Mauled.  By.  Puppies. 

The picture those words paint in my brain make it physically impossible for me to keep a straight face!  Maybe if it were my mother, or grandma, who was the victim of a vicious puppy mauling, I wouldn’t find the situation so amusing.  Maybe. 

I gotta tell ya, if given a choice of tortures, I would have to pick being mauled by puppies.  What could be a more adorable way to die?  Raped by bunnies?  Suffocated by kittens?  Trampled by baby elephants?  I think I would pick any of these over being slowly eaten away by cancer.  If anything, people would remember my death and smile.  I would like that.